Year End

Year End

Ear end usually is a time for reflection for what have we done past 12 months or 365 days or 8,760 hours or 525,600 minutes. Is it time important? It depends who you talk to. If you talk about concept of time to those have been through ups and downs in life, time is not necessarily as important as one thinks. If you talk to those have planned what lies ahead and are serious about the goals they set, time is smashingly important. What I learned in past years, in order to be fulfilled and joyful, one has to invest “attention” for what one wants to do. Not only that, one has to set goal, get feedback, prime challenge, ensuring that how to balance sagging nervousness resulting from stress and painless rot of daily routine. Both going to extreme can erode psyche energy that is important to perpetuate a normal life.

Let me take this break of turning old to new year to wishing everyone here a fruitful year ahead. Whatever you do and plan to do, be attentive not so much you lose the joy of life but enough to get what you want in life.

Keep Reading "Flow"

The section was talking about family. Some of the most rewarding or frustrated experiences one could have are result of family relationship. You have could a successful career but family usually is right up there as the number one priority especially when people looking back in life that how much they have missed by not being more with family members.

The core of family relationship lies with couples to which relationship is built and children look upon their parents as they search models in life from youngster, adolescent to young adult. Couple comprises to stay healthy is crucial and is a difficult task to maintain. Sustenance for marital relationship is a process both ma and pa must work hard on it. When two focus on each other, both must be change of habit to get the result of change they desire.Most know getting married requires a radical and permanent reorientation of the couple that suit the status from single to married. When a child added to the pair, that complicates the process triply that without conscious reflection of what role ma and pa are gonna be, it could derail the relationships as originally desired. All these conscious change and reflection take constant hard works. If a person is unwilling to adjust personal goals when starting a relationship as weighty as marriage, then a lot of what subsequently happens in that realtionshjp will produce disorder to a point that will derail the relationship itself. The book distincts outside and inside conditions that affect family. Outside condition encompasses family economic, materials, where to live, what profession of ma and pa. These are valued through the social norm that are weighty back in the minds of most people. The serenity lies with the inside condition where couple must look upon what they do is congruent what they believe and align with family members that create the bigger supporting background for inevitable adverse situations to come.

I like the quote by Cicero that to be completely free on must become a slave of a set of law. Personally it holds true to me. I know myself being mostly a desirous to be "free" person, the fact absolutely free is a ticket to "chaos" which is unthinkable for me in the past. The book cites examples how healthy marriage lasts, it's the commitment by ma and pa solemnly vowed to better, to worst, and to dealth that do them apart literally. By investing psyche energy (attention) to preserve the marriage is the best way as suggested by the author.

Autotelic/flow/optimal experience

Reading a book called Flow by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. I find terms called autotelic or flow or optimal experience essentially meaning one thing - state of happiness or enjoyment even in most daunting or horrifying conditions such as concentration camps, solidary confinements or paralytic medical complications. Some people are lucky few, unlike happiness eluding most population, they have certain rudiments of character that prompt happiness. They devote more psyche energy in exploring things they like to do in certain framework in mind which include things they enjoy doing must have goals, rules and feed backs. These framework allows people to push the standard to higher level which is essential to achieve the flow experience. Also they usually are brought up in the families which propose the 5C elements of building autotelic experience. These are:
Clarity - what parents expect of a child needs clearly expressed
Centering- parents are interested what children are doing than what they will be in the future
Choice - variety of possibilities children could choose including breaking parent's rules
Commitment - parents trust and allow the child to feel comfortable enough set aside the shield of his defenses and become unselfconsciously involved on things he is interested
Challenge - the parents' dedications to provide increasingly complex opportunity for action to their children

The book concluded that anyone can achieve autotelic experience which requires attention to building habits, investing psyche energy or attention in hobbies, sports, reading, art, music, even mundane routines that sometimes people find them rut. All these could make life enjoyable and take little resources apart from what we have already had. As parents, the 5C is some concept that is coinciding to coaching concept which worths parents to look into incorporating into their beings while kids are still young. It's never too late.

Gab with my son

It's been long time since my son and I have dinner alone without others together. What could be a better timing than wife is hiking in Nepal, young son touring in China, daughter outing with mates? This makes a wonderful break for Haywood and I chow down in my favorite Shanghais Restaurant in Happy Valley. We talked with no particular text and just shot breeze. Children grow by leaps and bounds. The fact I often hang around with family perhaps more than average dad is godsent luxury and blessing. The fact I run my own business have a lot to do with what I can do with my family. From the gab I endure with my children, I seldom find them bored. These kids don't fudge and mudge on subjects. What I babble, will get snappy come back in return. What else a dad can ask for!

Book Launch

It was a launch filled with closeness all around. Place was packed with people who from what I observed are genuinely happy for the event. Iris published her first book in which I played a tiny part as her coach. Vividly reminisce the day we met and later on agreed to stay in touch about the project, it seems like yesterday. Iris recounts of her experiences which is pictoric by MTR station map and different colors. What a novel idea! I read her book incessantly and enjoyed it a great deal. It takes boldness on Iris' part to unload her past in a way that she remains positive about the events. Iris conquered the ghosts as if it haunted her along. At a closer look, it provided most rewarding experiences she now treasures so much. A book like this is definitely a great way to share with others.

I'm happy for Iris as I would to all our friends who may encounter trials and tribulations that seem unbearable. On the flip side it could be blessing in disguise which is essential if we were to enjoy life in its fullness.

Riddles for Kids--Answers

1. A mouse. It squeaks.

2. A cheetah.

3. A starfish.

4. A pineapple.

5. The banana split.

6. It ran out of juice.

7. If you add 4 and 4, you get 8.

8. Because they have their own scales

9. When it is full.

10. Because she was all tied up.

Riddles for Kids

6. Why did the orange stop in the middle of the road?

7. Why is it dangerous to do Math in the jungle?

8. Why fish is easy to weigh?

9. When is the moon heaviest?

10. Why couldn’t the mummy answer the telephone?